I Resolve To...

As I ring in my first New Year's Eve, there are many things I wish to improve upon in 2011. Here are my first resolutions.

Walk
Stop pulling Sasha's fur
Get to the Gym
Take Up Jogging
Give More to Charity
Lay Off the Bottle
Eat More Fish
Watch More Educational Programming
Learn How to do the Moonwalk

Happy New Year! 2010 was the best year ever!! (Well, at least as far as I know)

Look Who's Talking!

Well, at 10 months and 21 days old here's a run down of my talking statistics.

My verbal abilities clearly outweigh my physical prowess. But I think it's better to learn to talk your way out of anything than run from it. Here's a list of adorable words I can say in order of importance...sorry dad.

Mama
Dada
Oomba (Roomba robot vacuum cleaner, third word said...sorry Sasha)
Dog (I love Sasha but she's still not that into me, she'll come around once I start eating whole bananas)
Lo (when answering the phone)
Papa (with some coaching over Christmas)
Momo (with some coaching over Christmas)
Ta-Ta (short for Chantal)
DoDo (Chantal's word for nap in French, short for Dormir)
Uh-oh
Bub-ba (Bubbles)
Da-Dah (Sasha)
Bok Bok (my parents love Chicken)
Ba (could be ball, bottle, or bye depending on my mood)
No-No
Hippopotomonstrosesquipedaliophobia

A Kiss To Remember

Wait a minute, wait a minute. Where have you been all my life Hershey Kisses? These kisses are so much better than the ones I get from my family and that scary Clown at Gymboree. I mean, as delicious as processed fruit, rice oatmeal, butternut squash and baby yogurt might be, this is where it’s at as far as I’m concerned. Not sure why I have to dress like a hamburger and bug my neighbors at night to get this tasty treat or why a bunch of freaks rang our doorbell all night to get some of the goods from my dad, but then again I guess I don’t really know anything, except that cell phones are so awesome. I certainly don’t know a better way to honor the Celtic festival of Samhain and the Christian holiday All Saints’ Day. So Happy Halloween, now give me some candy!

Timeless Art of the Tubbie

As long as I can remember, I have loved my tubbie. A time to strip down into my birthday suit and splish and splash while my parents sing off key songs that I can tell I’m glad I don’t know the lyrics to. But lately, even the tubbie hasn’t been able to contain my desire to show off my moves. I try to escape to my right, but run into this marble wall. I try and crawl out the left, but need to grab on to mom as I slip and slide. But, at least I get some cute photos out of it.

Hazes of Corn Mazes

So I don’t like to brag but I recently got asked by Hadley to visit the pumpkin patch and of course I accepted. While this wasn’t officially my first date because you know who was there spying on me, I enjoyed crunching the fall leaves under my stroller wheels and “accidentally” brushing Hadley’s hand on the hayride. Our moms used this as an excuse to take 150 pictures of us posing with goats, horses, cows, behind wood cutouts, inside dinosaur eggs (which made no sense), on a train, in our strollers, holding pumpkins, and sitting next to gourds. If this is any indication of what the next 17 years will bring, I can’t say I’m looking forward to the prom. Come to think of it, I’m not sure my mom is looking forward to me asking for $200 just to afford going to Chipotle and to a matinee in the year 2027.

Tahoe is so dope bro

Dude, I was like so totally stoked when I found out we were going to Cali for summer break. Pappie and Bubbie threw down some mad pesos on a phat shack on Lake Tahoe. My favorite hipsters, Aunt P and Uncle J came and kept the mood like totally mello bro. We hiked some rad trails, hopped on some cruisers to ride along the river and otherwise just soaked in nature man. At night we raged till my new teeth hurt. Every restaurant we hit was so dope. My 6 month birthday was banging, the Sierra Nevadas were sweet. Already looking forward to Aunt P’s and Uncle J’s wedding down in SoCal.

Gymboree is all About ME!!

I'm so glad mom and dad take me to gymboree. I usually start by doing some diamond pushups on the mat followed by working my tris through the blue tunnel. My personal trainer Miss Emily has got me on a strict regiment of drooling on balls, giggling at the flying parachute, and squealing at bubbles. It's really quite exhausting. One hour a day for 90 more days and I'll be joining Team Jacob. Besides working on my singing voice and buffing up my biceps for Hadley, there are balls, bubbles, tunnels, scarves, parachutes, and bells for me to play with and a constant reminder that I AM the cutest baby in Silver Spring. The other babies have good qualities too. I mean Nolan has a nice head of luxurious hair, Jessica has a cute figure, Mae has got 4 beautiful teeth, Jason has the coolest socks, and Nash has sweet blue shoes. But hey, none of them have the total package or have been deemed "The Best Boy" repeatedly. Luckily, we have an Army recruitment center next door and they are already trying to enlist me (yes, they start that young) and hook me up with sweet secret gear that you don't even know about.

An Open Letter to the CEO of PEPCO

Dear Pepco,

I believe you may need a bit of help: Electricity is a form of energy involving the flow of electrons. All matter is made up of atoms, and an atom has a center, called a nucleus. The nucleus contains positively charged particles called protons and uncharged particles called neutrons. When the balancing force between protons and electrons is upset by an outside force, an atom may gain or lose an electron. When electrons are "lost" from an atom, the free movement of these electrons constitutes an electric current.
Beginning with Benjamin Franklin's experiment with a kite one stormy night in Philadelphia, the principles of electricity gradually became understood. In the mid-1800s, everyone's life changed with the invention of the electric light bulb. Prior to 1879, electricity had been used in arc lights for outdoor lighting. The lightbulb's invention used electricity to bring indoor lighting to our homes.

Hmmm...mid 1800's huh? Can you explain why we have needed to buy 4 different gallons of milk this month and had to throw out Bubbe's frozen cajun chicken casseroles from the freezer? I have learned many new tricks this month. I sit up and play, eat different foods including cheerios and puffs, I scoot on the ground to try and get toys, unfortunately no one can see me doing these things because I've been sitting in the dark for most of the month. I'm expecting great things this winter Pepco, I don't plan on going to bed in the dark wearing a snowsuit. Don't let me down.

I would have posted this sooner, but needed power restored so I could site my resources: http://inventors.about.com/library/inventors/blelectric.htm

The Real King of South Beach

Sorry I've been on hiatus from blogging but it's been a crazy summer filled with sand, sun, and milk. In early July, I took my talents to South Beach just like some other guy in the news who needs LOTS of attention. I took my first flight in this big car and charmed all the flight attendants into giving mom and dad peanuts and sodas. Unlike mom and dad, I went to the airport way more prepared for security since I was barefoot. I want to give a shout out to Southwest for letting my 8 bags fly free. I know what you're thinking, I am a bit high maintenance, but I need my multiple hats, sunglasses, and salon grade high powered ceramic hair dryer. We got a big cabana next to an enormous tubby where lots of people were splashing and drinking fruity drinks. My great uncle Chris was turning 50 so there was a big reason to celebrate. I'm assuming he is only 50 months old because I don't know what comes after months. It was a great party and I danced the night away with Gloria Estefan, Enrique Iglesias, and Ray Finkel.

America, OH YEAH!

I understand that I've been to the National Mall and the White House, but I slept through those outings. And, I watched the season finally of American Idol, been to Starbucks and Target, and even gotten a chicken sandwich at a Burger King drive thru after midnight. Only now, however, having been to the Captol and celebrated Independence Day watching the fireworks on the National Mall, do I know what it means to be an American.

Taking a tour of the Capitol with my PaPa, MoMo, their friends Diana and Jack, my cousin Caroline, and Mom was great. First, I got to meet the other woman in dad's life, the distinguished gentle lady from the third district of the great state of Connecticut. I really loved her scarf, big glasses, and hippster shoes, and she seems like I nice lady, but I wish she would let dad come home earlier for tubby wubby time. From there we saw the House floor, the Capitol dome and so many other things that aren't quite as great as my new bouncy swing, but sure were interesting.

Later in the week was July 4th and I went to a BBQ at my friends' Maggie's and Callum's house. I couldn't believe that my mom had ribs, a hot dog and a brat, but she said she needed the energy so that she can go blow stuff up. America, OH YEAH! Anyway, I had a great time playing with other kids, dipping my toes in the pool and taking in the glorious fireworks. What a day, what a country, and 3 cheers for freedom!

A Break From the Daily Grind

Finally, I get a little R & R! A lovely staycation in National Harbor was just what I needed. You know it's hard out there for a baby...rolling one way, then the other, staring at the dog, taking 4-6 naps a day, grabbing for everything, and hours of babbling and blowing bubbles. I REALLY needed some time to de-stress and reflect on my first 5 months.

I left it all behind...including my briefcase, newspapers, and cup of morning ambition to join momo, papa, mom, and dad at the Gaylord National Convention Center. I also got to meet my cousin Caroline for the first time, which was great! We took a boat to Alexandria to see Miss Hadley, went to the Peep store, watched the world cup, and got big steaks. Mom and Dad also got to celebrate their 5th wedding anniversary while I partied the night away with Sean Penn.

However, it wasn't all play and no work...I also headed over the to Air and Space Museum, sans rocket pj's, to take one small step for mankind and rub elbows with some astronauts. I'm on my way to a long, promising career in the space program and it's never too early for some nepotism. But first, I think I'll have a "nap"otism.

Levi 1 Rice Cereal 0

Strap me in my chair, snap on that tray, clear off the toys, velcro on a fabulous bib and voila... you have a boy who is ready to chow down. Bring it on solid food, I can handle it. We eat with our cheeks, right? Or maybe it's our forehead. Oh wait, I know, I wait for mom to spill it on my bib and then I suck it off.

4 Month Update

Even though I'm almost 5 months old, I've been SO busy that I haven't recapped month 4 which is obviously important. I mean when they look back on great scientists, musicians, and artists the first entry in their biographies are always what they did in the fourth month of life. I am still weighing in at the 90% percentile 17 pounds 10 ounces. My height has moved up to the 50th at 25 inches and I am stretching out a bit because I CAN'T STOP MOVING!!

Once again I stimulated my mind at the art gallery with my buddies Callum and Maggie. We got a little bored looking at pictures and were much more interested in grabbing our parents faces on a bench. I hope they enjoy this free entertainment for awhile. As you know, I have been rolling over both ways with ease. Time to cover up the outlets and start childproofing because sharp corners, here I come.

Mom was back at work and I spent some time with Momo and Grandma and gained a bit of independence and learned how to cook and garden. I still love my tubby wubby and kick and splash the whole time. We got a 12 month outfit to take my picture in for every month up to a year, unfortunately, I am outgrowing it!

Getting to Know Grandma

Since I don't get to see Grandma very often, I saved up all my tricks for her visit! The first day she was here, I rolled over, spun around in my exersaucer, and took a long nap in my crib. I did lots of fun things with Grandma and was mesmerized by her talents in the kitchen that are rivaled only by the food network. She filled our tummies with shrimp, salmon, steak, chicken, lava cakes, brownies, thai dishes, and cookies, that even though I only received second hand, make me look even more forward to eating solid food. She also whipped up several months of pureed baby food for me to enjoy! She knows the way to a boys heart is through his tummy. Grandma also got to experience what happens after waiting a few days for that food to run it's course. Thanks Grandma, I love you! See you and Pappie in Tahoe!

Stealing Girls Hearts and Boys Lunch Money

When I look at my beautiful visage in the mirror as I wear this januty cap it reminds me that in fashion you're either in or you're out, and right now I'm in. It also reminds me that I look pretty tough and that Jackson owes me 50 cents and he better pay up. I know, I know, aboriginal tribes believe in the concept that a photo might steal a part of your soul. But you know what, how many abodiginals do you see modeling? So look out Bryant Park, here I come. And, Heidi, you better tell little Lou Sulola Samuel to lookout, cause there's a heartbreaker coming to town with the jauntiest cap you've ever seen. And if anybody gets in my way, they are going to find themselves wearing cement shoes at the bottom of the Potomac.

It's hard getting off the bottle...

Untitled from jonathan zeitlin on Vimeo.

Another great accomplishment by moi

Untitled from jonathan zeot;om on Vimeo.

Oh, how about that? I can roll over now. I believe that's 1 for Levi and none for Sasha! What up now doggy??

That's Right, I am the Best Boy

Untitled from jonathan zeot;om on Vimeo.

Mom cracks me up. She's always talking to me in that funny baby voice! It's true though: I AM the best boy.

Missing Momo

Has anyone seen my momo? I swear she was just here for the last 6 weeks and I can't find her. I looked under the couch and behind my crib. I checked the chair where she rocked me for hours. I looked outside where she landscaped and mulched, but she seems to be misplaced. I checked the bottle warmer to see if she was just heating one up. Maybe I need to take more fish oil but she isn't where I left her and I can't seem to locate her. Maybe it is because my short term memory is only 7 seconds long. Wait... what was I talking about? Oh, yeah, if you see my momo, tell her I love her.

My Future's So Bright, I Gotta Wear Shades

Hello Cleveland! Thanks for coming out tonight. We're taking you back to the 80's with Timbuk 3 and we've got our amps cranked up to 11!

I study exersaucer,
I love my classes,
I got crazy parents, who wear dark glasses.
Things are going great, and they're only getting better.
Sleeping 10 hours a night, not having tirades.
My future's so bright, I gotta wear shades.

Well I'm heavenly blessed and wordly wise,
Really chunky thighs and light blue eyes,
Things are going great, and they're only getting better.
Sleeping 10 hours a night, not having tirades.
My future's so bright, I gotta wear shades.